Mother's Day

A guest post
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TO HELL WITH TODAY'S MOTHERS, I WANT MOMS BACK THE WAY THEY USED TO BE!!!!
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A Mothers Day Message by Mean Old Man
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I'm fit to be tied that the once sacred holiday, Mother's Day is still being celebrated despite the fact that today's Moms are nothing but a gang of prissy spoon fed subversives!!!
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Mothers today have it too easy and they have no idea what being a real Mom is all about.
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When my dear ol' Mom married Pops way back in the day, she knew that she was signing on for a whole new life. Mom would get up an hour before dawn, pound out the yeast to make a loaf of bread, run the clothes through the trusty wringer washer (not those stupid "easy" automatic washers they have today), stoke the coal furnace and mop up the floor---all in one hours time!!! Try that you Barbie doll Moms of today!!!


Today's Moms want their cake and they want to eat it too! My stupid son Harlan's wife is an accountant--can you imagine that? I don't know about you, but letting women control money is like giving the fox the run of the chicken coupe. I don't need to get into the details. I remember being over their goofy house one time and she asks me if I want to stay for dinner; she told me they were having meatloaf and mashed potatoes---a meal fit for a real man. SO, I am wandering in the kitchen and I notice that the stove is not on and I can't smell anything but her French bordello perfume. I asked her what time dinner was going to be---midnight?? She then proceeded to open up the freezer and plopped out five Stouffer's TV Dinners---Meatloaf, of course. Well, you could have knocked me over with a damned feather!!! Anyway, after about ten minutes in the microwave, we had our meatloaf, and let me tell you, I'm not one to complain, but I wouldn't feed that garbage to my bulldog Titus!!!
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In my day Mom spent the day cooking and cleaning---not going off to some accounting job to satisfy her career urges. Sometimes Pops would come home with a deer and it was Mom's job to cut it up and prepare it for the ice box. Sometimes she would nick her fingers or her arm and she would bleed like a gopher. She would bandage herself up and go right on with the cutting because her family was depending on her. Sometimes the cut would become infected and swell up like a basketball; the pain would be so intense that her tears could fill a lake. It was horrible, depressing and degrading for her---but she loved it!!! Because she was doing her job, the job that became hers the day she agreed to marry Pops. Back then, marriage was a real partnership. Pops worked all day and Mom stayed at home and did her few jobs and afterwards could spend the rest of the day in the lap of luxury.
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Moms today can't cook, can't sew, can't do the wash, and don't know a damned thing about raising kids!!! I don't know about your family, but it appears to me that my grandkids are raising "their" Moms. The kids today tell the parents what to do and are snippy and brazen.
I remember when I was a boy and we were at the dinner table and my dunce of a little brother Chuck threw a spoonful of potatoes at Mom. She was facing toward the stove so she thought that I had done it. She howled like a wolf and flung a ladle straight for my head; needless to say she hit a bulls eye (if she were born a man, she could have given Sandy Koufax a run for his money). I remember crying and trying to tell Mom that it was Chuck and not me that threw the potatoes, but ol' Mom would have none of that. She immediately sent me to my room and apart from going to school I spent the next week up there and without any food except for a little bread and water to keep me alive. I can still see the snicker on that lug Chuck's face when Mom kicked my butt (literally) up the stairs. I never liked my brother Chuck, he was a kid ahead of his time, since Mom and even Pops always liked him best. When he graduated high school they put him through college. When I finished the 8th grade, I was told to get a full time job or head out the door!! I had the last laugh, however; Chuck married some hussy who took him for every dollar he had. He spent the rest of his life drinking like a fish!! See what happens when your parents kiss your butt. RIP Chuck, you deserve that much; and I do kind of miss those times we had together as kids (especially when I would lock you in our rat infested basement).
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It seems to me that Moms today just have kids for the hell of it, because all their girlfriends are doing the same. They have no appreciation of family values or morality. Their idea of family values is to gather the kids in the car and take them to see some stupid movie like "Free Willy", not going to church because that would be too boring. IN my day all the women made it to church every Sunday, it was their duty to keep a connection to God in the family. But, not anymore-----damn!!!
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I could go on and on about how useless today's Moms {?} are, but why bother?? So, all you liberal, working Moms, have a Happy Mother's Day. As for me, I'll be spending my Sunday morning watching the Three Stooges on the ol TV'er, waiting for the missus to come home from church to serve me venison stew along with her champion biscuits on the side. Afterwards, when my stupid sons and daughters in law come over with their offspring, I'll retire upstairs to my makeshift den with a couple bottles of Steg, lighting up a Lucky, and listening to the soothing sounds of Eddie Fisher singing "Oh My Papa" on the ol' victrola.
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Happy Mother's Day. I hate you all!!!!