With all the fun of digging out of 2 feet of snow I almost forgot about Cupid. Someone didn't.
TO HELL WITH VALENTINES DAY!!! By Mean Old Man
I'm angier than Hillary Clinton in a singing class over the way the Commies have
prissied up my “Manly” country with their Valentines Day celebrations!!! Every year on that damned day I see schmuck after schmuck go into the different florist shops (that are, no doubt, fronts for the American Communist Party) to order flowers for the wife or girlfriend who said she didn’t want any (and if she didn’t get any—the poor saps would have a shiner the size of a softball on their eye); all the while paying ten times the normal price—money which I am sure is going right back to the Kremlin!!!!
In my day we celebrated Valentines Day too, but it wasn’t infected by the Commie manifesto. You bought your best girl a new ironing board or cake pan, or if you were really a Don Juan, a pair of bloomers—to make her womanly duties easier---she didn’t want or expect stupid flowers, or candy to make her fatter than she already was—she wanted things to help her along in her housework!!!! Sure, she toiled all day long, cooking, cleaning, baking from scratch and puttin’ the clothes through the ol’ trusty wringer washer--then hanging them out in the bitter cold—and it didn’t matter if she was sick—the work had to be done and the man’s dinner had to be on the table at 5—whether he was coming home or not---and she knew what would happen if it wasn’t---and she loved it!!!!
But now, all these damned commie “career women” have ruined all the fun of being a real woman. The dumb broads today can't even boil water—let alone cook a good biscuit. My stupid hippy son Clay’s harlet wife had us over for Thanksgiving last year and I saw her put this dust that looked as if it came from out of a sweeper bag into a pot of boiling water—I had to ask; she told me it was stovetop stuffing—all of a sudden this dust starts swelling into some concoction that looked like the droppings that my ol’ hound dog Titus used to leave on the living room floor (and if you have a problem with my argument, think of this--can you imagine Duke Wayne after a hard day if chasing cattle rustlers, coming off of the range (no pun intended) and eating stove top stuffing? NO!!!). My whole Thanksgiving ruined because of some Commie stuffing (no doubt filled with some sort of mind altering drug)---Damn!!!!! And all of this sorry crap is rooted in the modern day Commie Valentine’s Day!!!
All the men (?) of America today have been feminized to make the women happy—well, what about the happiness of men!!! MY stupid grandson Josh is even forced to take home economics in school nowadays. Can you believe that?? Our schools are raising a bunch of girlie panty waste wimps!!! In my day we took shop—and you got your trusty saw out with your drill and sometimes you lost a finger or an eye—and we loved it (!), and would laugh it off---it was great!!!!!! That’s when men were men and a woman knew her place (and it wasn’t whining about getting Valentine’s candy and a damned dinner!).
So all you prissy Commie loving men out there---make sure you get to the florist on time (the Kremlin is depending on you) and don't forget those chocolates too (gotta keep the little woman as fat as Mrs. Stalin and Mrs. Khruschev were!). As for me, I’m stopping by the Wal Mart and picking up a good ol baking pan and some bread crumbs for the little woman (at my age, I'll just skip the bloomers). Then I’m hitting home, popping open a Steg, listen to a little Nat King Cole while waiting for my biscuits to be served straight from a brand new pan.
That’s My America, Commies. That’s My Valentine’s Day.
HAPPY VALENTINES DAY---I HATE YOU ALL!!!!!!!!!!!
1 hour ago