Sunday, October 24, 2010

The 2010 World Series

I don't have a dog in this fight since the Phillies came up short and the team we love to root against (the Yankees) was eliminated. But I always put up a poll on the sidebar and I don't want to break a tradition.

Here is another view of the great American passtime.


By Mean Old Man

I’m fit to be tied over the fact that it is once again playoff/world series time in the prissy game of baseball!!! Ballplayers today are nothing but a bunch of glorified and overpaid panty wastes who couldn’t measure up to the players of my day---including my buddies and me who used to play after school or while playing hooky.

I remember one time when I was at the plate and my pal Gummo pitched a scorcher that came straight to my head and whacked me for a loop. I remember laying on the hard ground and the throbbing pain in my jaw and the taste of blood in my mouth. In fact, the blood was gushing out of it faster than Old Faithful. It was a nightmare and the pain was ripping me apart----IT WAS GREAT!!!

Because me and my pals knew the joy of the pain of good baseball; not like the sissy boys of today’s game.

And what about the fairy boot pitchers today. In my day we had guys like good ol’ Babe Ruth. The Bambino could go out all night and drink his tail off while playing winning hands at poker and get by on one hour of sleep yet still show up at the ballpark to pitch a great game, try that, Halladay!!!!

My old man used to take me to Yankee stadium (when it was a good year) and I got to see all of the greats play. Good ol’ Joltin Joe DiMaggio could hit with the best of them and dated great gals like Marilyn Monroe. I bet there isn’t a single panty waste in the whole National or American leagues who could even handle an hour with good ol’ Marilyn---now there was a dame!!! I remember once when Pops dragged me across the street after a game outside of the house that Ruth built over to the Stands bar. My old man was quite the consumer of alcohol, some in the neighborhood would go so far as to call him a drunk, but he was a real man as far as I’m concerned. Anyway, after drowning himself with about 8, 9 or 10 Ballentines, he dragged me out in the street for a whooping because I failed to catch a foul ball that some goofball Red Sock had hit toward us earlier. Just as he was about to give me the (deserved) beating of my life, out of the shadows comes the Babe. You know, they say that Ruth liked kids because he was an orphan or something like that, but it ain’t so; the Bambino saw my Pops getting ready to lasso me with his trusty belt and I was expecting to hear him protest at the horrible treatment this adult was about to give his son, boy, was I wrong!!!

“Give it to him good!” I heard Babe scream to my dad, “ He probably deserves it, anyway!” With that my pops cracked my back about four or five or six times and afterwards dragged me back to the bar with the Babe in tow.

To this very day, Babe Ruth is my favorite ball player because he knew that kids were to be seen and not heard and that most importantly a son should never disappoint his old man by missing an oncoming foul ball in a baseball stadium—glove or no glove.

The world series used to be an event, too!!! In my day you could catch the games in the afternoons, you didn’t have to stay up until 1, 2 or 3 in the morning to catch the bottom of the 9th. Try that today; because the entire game is all about money and not about the fans. Good ol’ Mickey Mantle used to sell used cars in the offseason. I’d like to see Derek Cheater do that. Hell, maybe I’m wrong, Cheater would actually do quite well as a used car salesman, he’s certainly given the fans a real snow job for the past few years!!! Damn!!!!!

And whatever happened to fighting in baseball???? IN my time there would be a dustup practically every game and sometimes more than one time. Players like the great Billy Martin wouldn’t take no gupp from nobody and they were glad to give a knuckle sandwich to some schmuck from Boston. Poor Billy got a raw deal, first from goofy Steinbrenner, who , like a woman, could never make up his mind and secondly from father time who ended his far too soon. I bet if Billy were here today, even as an old man, he could beat the crap out of any player in the majors. Hell, even I could do that, though!!!!

Baseball players today have it too easy and they don’t know anything about what the game is all about. I know some little leaguers who can out play these goofs---and that’s coming from someone who isn’t a fan of kids.

So, anyway, enjoy your dumb world series. Maybe the ghost of George Steinbrenner will come over and nag you like the little woman does. You prissy wimps probably would enjoy that. Go to Hell!!!!!!!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

One word to describe this year's series unless you are from Texas or SF: B O R I N G!!!